YOU ARE NOT INFERTILE
Now, before you get
upset or go to send me a private email or comment, please read this with an
open heart. This is not a post intended to offend ANYONE. It is actually the
opposite. It is a post that has been on my heart for some time now that I have
been wanting to share with whoever desires to read it. It is a post to shed
light on a subject that I truly believe God holds dear and Satan absolutely
fears. It’s to bring truth to a topic that the enemy has lied about and has
caused many believers to give into and believe. This is a post to bring
healing, restoration, encouragement, and a game plan to do what God commanded
couples to do and that is to be” fruitful and multiply”.
I am a born again
Christian. I take the Word of God as truth and I see it as black and white. I
don’t think that when God wrote scripture that He put any hidden messages in
it, or made it difficult for people to understand and believe. I don’t believe
He sugarcoated anything. I take His Word and apply it to my life and I EXPECT
it to produce fruit in ANY and EVERY aspect of my day-to-day life. Both in big
areas and “small” areas.
You can be a
Christian and know what God’s Word says, but honestly that does not mean a
thing when it comes to battling the challenges the enemy will constantly throw
at you. If you do not believe with expectancy you will not experience God’s
blessings in your life. It isn’t God with holding from you because He will
continue to love you and bless you because He adores His children, but you will
not experience ALL He has for you is you don’t truly believe what He can do in
your life. James 1:6-8 reads, “But when
you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a
wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to
receive anything from the Lord. Such a person is double-minded and unstable in
all they do.”
Many people know my
husband and I tried to conceive for a little over a year. In medical
terminology that would put us in the category of “infertility”. Infertility is
defined as “a disease of the reproductive
system defined by the failure to achieve a clinical pregnancy after 12 months
or more of regular unprotected sexual intercourse.” By the worlds standards
that is what we were considered. Infertile. Month after month of timing, trying,
and planning, my multiple pregnancy tests would read “NEGATIVE”. Probably the
most hurtful word a woman trying to have a baby can read. We had people make
ignorant comments to us. Others asked if everything was ok and if we should go
get tested. Some suggested going on medication or looking into alternatives to
help us get pregnant. But you know what? We never felt God lead us in that
direction. I never felt a nudge to go get tested. I never felt a gentle guiding
hand to look into alternatives. I am in no way saying that any of those things
are bad because I know they have been a blessing and super helpful for many
people. I just know for our story, our testimony, our walk with God; it was not
for us.
After a few months of
pity parties and a trash can filled with negative tests and defeated tear
filled tissues, I knew there was more I could be doing aside from what we were
doing in the natural. I knew that God called my husband and I to be parents. It
says in Genesis 1:28, “God BLESSED them
and said to them, ‘Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and
subdue it.” God not only COMMANDED my husband and I to have children but He
blessed (past tense) my womb in order to fulfill that commandment. My womb in
blessed. My husbands reproductive system in blessed. So why was I doubting
something God already ordained to happen? I know that when God makes a promise
He keeps it. So why was it so hard for me to trust that I would not only become
pregnant but sustain a pregnancy?
I needed to sit down
in quiet and allow God to speak to my heart and figure out WHY I was having
such a hard time with believing I would be a mother of many children like it
says in Psalm 113:9, “He makes the
barren woman a family AND a joyful mother of CHILDREN.” I came to realize
that the issue I was having and the issue I believe many women are having is
they do not have real faith when it comes to this area. We want something so
badly, but we go back and forth with unbelief. You can say that isn’t true. But
until you realize you have been battling unbelief and you do something about it
you will be like the father in Mark 9
who had wanted so badly for his son who suffered for years with an unclean
spirit to be healed but wasn’t BECAUSE of the father’s unbelief.
If you have never
read this story it goes like this:
A man in the crowd answered, “Teacher, I
brought you my son, who is possessed by a spirit that has robbed him of speech.
Whenever it seizes him, it throws him to the ground. He foams at the mouth,
gnashes his teeth and becomes rigid. I asked your disciples to drive out the
spirit, but they could not.” “You unbelieving generation,” Jesus replied, “how
long shall I stay with you? How long shall I put up with you? Bring the boy to
me.” So they brought him. When the spirit saw Jesus, it immediately threw the
boy into a convulsion. He fell to the ground and rolled around, foaming at the
mouth. Jesus asked the boy’s father, “How long has he been like this?” “From
childhood,” he answered. “It has often thrown him into fire or water to kill
him. But if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.” “‘If you can’?”
said Jesus. “Everything is possible for one who believes.” Immediately the
boy’s father exclaimed, “I do believe help me overcome my unbelief!” When Jesus
saw that a crowd was running to the scene, he rebuked the impure spirit. “You
deaf and mute spirit,” he said, “I command you, come out of him and never enter
him again.” The spirit shrieked, convulsed him violently and came out. The boy
looked so much like a corpse that many said, “He’s dead.” But Jesus took him by
the hand and lifted him to his feet, and he stood up. After Jesus had gone
indoors, his disciples asked him privately, “Why couldn’t we drive it out?” He replied,
“This kind can come out only by prayer.”
You
see, this young boy for years was battling this possession. Sound familiar?
Some of you reading this may have been battling conceiving for years. The
unclean spirit that possessed him would come and go. Sound familiar? You may
have ended up conceiving and miscarried. The father was desperate. You are
desperate. He admitted he was battling with unbelief. I mean who wouldn’t
battle with unbelief after repeated “failures”? If I was in his shoes and I saw
my child being possessed for years to the point of almost dying on several
occasions I think I too would be battling doubt and unbelief.
I
love the part where the father says “If you can do anything, take pity on us
and help us.” And Jesus looks at him like BOY WHO DO YOU THINK I AM and
replies, “IF you can?! EVERYTHING is possible for one who BELIEVES” The father
then admits he has not been believing and asks Jesus to help him overcome his
unbelief. So that is where I started on my journey to believing God would
fulfill His promise in giving us children. I admitted, “Jesus, I have sinned. I
have been fearful and worried and I have been living a life of unbelief.
Forgive me and help me with my unbelief.”
As
soon as I did that, something inside of me changed. That defeated, pitiful,
doubtful spirit I was once operating in turned into a joyful, excited,
expectant spirit. I no longer dreaded taking a pregnancy test if I was late. If
it said negative I would say, “Ok Lord, lets keep going, show me more on this topic.
What else can I learn to build my relationship with you and grow my faith?”
Another month would come and again the pregnancy test would read NEGATIVE.
“Praise God, my body is blessed. My womb is blessed. I WILL be blessed with
many children. It may not be this month but I have MANY more months for it to
happen.” I needed to change my mindset when it came to how I viewed this topic.
Your mind is a battlefield and if you give the enemy a foothold and he can
cause you to doubt, it will be a very unpleasant and tough battle to overcome.
Something my mom told me years ago is, “it is SO MUCH easier to ignore a stray
cat and keep it out of your house then give it a little bowl of milk and then
try to get it out of your house.” Boy was that true for me. I gave the enemy a
bowl of milk and then wanted him to leave when he already made himself at home.
But praise God I got him out. It was now time to repair the damage he did to my
home. I started worshipping the Lord in song. We see that the walls of Jericho literally
came falling down during worship. I filled my mind with scripture and spoke it
over my body and life daily. I prayed for my children and their health. I
learned how to speak life into a situation the enemy wanted me to believe was dead.
I NEVER EVER spoke infertility over my body no matter what doctors and medical
professional defined my situation as. I finally made the decision in my mind
that I AM going to have a baby and I wanted that baby in Gods timing because
ANYTHING apart from God is failure and I would not accept failure. If that
meant waiting another year or another or another I made the decision to rejoice
in the waiting and continuing to grow my faith and live every moment with an
expectant heart.
It’s
funny because when I did find out I was pregnant I totally forgot I even took a
pregnancy test. I was at my friends house for 4th of July and we
were sitting on her porch and I was telling her I wasn’t feeling too great. She
immediately asked, “are you pregnant?!” HMM that was a good question. It was
not something I even thought about until she said it. (Which let me just say,
when you finally make the decision to truly trust God and His Will and promises
for your life with expectancy, you no longer live in bondage and are no longer
consumed with that which you are believing God for. You can live day to day
fully at peace and rest knowing God has ALL things under control. I was
experiencing that. A topic that consumed all my time was now something I didn’t
think about EVERY SINGLE MOMENT. It was so freeing!)
Anyway
back to my little story. My friend encouraged me to take a test. I figured, it
doesn’t hurt to take it. I went to CVS bought a two pack and took a test. This
was July 4th. The test said negative. I started crying. Not tears of
sorrow but tears of joy! I felt so much joy in that moment. I can’t explain it.
All I can say is God literally took my tears of mourning and sorrow and turned
them into joy! I praised God and thanked Him for our little baby that He
fearfully and wonderfully made and went on with my day. Fast-forward 6 days to
July 10th. It was a Sunday
morning and I woke up to get ready for church. The moment my feet hit the
ground I felt a still small voice encourage me to go take that second test in
the box from the other day. “But God,
the test I took a few days ago said negative. Why would I take another one?”
But I kept feeling that little nudge to take it. So I did and I put the test
down on the counter and continued doing my makeup and hair. 10 minutes later I
remembered I took that test so I glanced down and say YES+. HUH? HOW? I said to
my husband who was still in bed sleeping, “BABE! I think I’m pregnant! Does YES
mean I’m pregnant?” Well two more confirmed tests and another at the doctor
confirmed our little nugget! Can I get an AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You
guys, I can stand here today as someone who would be grouped in the infertile
category and tell you that word that doctors and others throw out so easily is
a LIE! Do not speak that. Do not believe that. If I would have spoken that over
my body and believed that word to be true in my situation I don’t believe I
would be sitting here holding our precious baby boy. Honestly. I would not be
experiencing his little smiles and him holding my fingers as I nurse him. We
would have an empty room in our house not a nursery. You see God ALREADY has
your blessings in a storehouse waiting to release them to you. Malachi 3:10 reads, “Bring
the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test
me in this," says the LORD Almighty, "and see if I will not throw
open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not
be room enough to store it.” God
is waiting for you to submit. He is waiting for you to believe. Not just know.
I
know that eating healthy is good for me. I know my body will reap so many
rewards from filling it with vitamin and mineral enriched foods but if I do not
take the action to actually eat healthy my body will reap nothing. That is the
same when it comes to the difference between knowing what God says and
BELIEVING what God says. You need to put your faith into practice.
Sisters,
families, husbands, whoever is reading this. I urge you to get into a quiet
place and repent if you have been living with unbelief. Ask God to forgive you
and help you overcome that unbelief. He is loving and faithful and eager to
help!
Next
take back the ground that you gave over to the enemy. Satan has NO POWER unless
you give it to him. Take back your mind. Rebuke the chains he has placed around
you and rebuke the authority you have allowed him to possess in your life.
Then
fill your mind with Scripture. Do a Word study on what God has to say about
children, motherhood, fertility, etc. The way to overcome doubt like Jesus said
in Mark 9 (above) is through prayer but let your prayer be filled with power,
the power of truth found in scripture. Prayer is a mighty weapon and when it
comes to weapons I’m not trying to have some dull little knife I want a sharp
two edged sword like it says in Hebrews 4:12, “For the word of God is alive
and powerful. It is sharper than the sharpest two-edged sword, cutting between
soul and spirit, between joint and marrow. It exposes our innermost thoughts
and desires.” AMEN?!
If
you have not been feeling encouraged to get in the Word and see what God has to
say about your situation I would love to give you some scriptures I meditated
on, but I encourage you to find some of your own, ones that speak to you and
your heart. And believe them, sweet ones. Don’t just read them. Let those
promises from God himself penetrate your heart. Read them knowing they are FOR
YOU and expect them to come to fruition in your life.
SCRIPTURES
Psalm 84:11 For the LORD God
is our sun and our shield. He gives us grace and glory. The LORD will withhold
no good thing from those who do what is right.
Psalm 127:3-5 Children are a
gift from the LORD; they are a reward from him. Children born to a young man
are like arrows in a warrior's hands. How joyful is the man whose quiver is
full of them! He will not be put to shame when he confronts his accusers at the
city gates.
Psalm 113:9 He gives the
childless woman a family, making her a happy mother. Praise the LORD!
You
will enjoy the fruit of your labor. How joyful and prosperous you will be! Your
wife will be like a fruitful grapevine, flourishing within your home.
Deuteronomy 7:14 You shall be
blessed above all peoples; there shall not be a male or female barren
among you or among your livestock.
Deuteronomy 28:1-2, 4,
and 11
If
you fully obey the LORD your God and carefully keep all his commands that I am
giving you today, the LORD your God will set you high above all the nations of
the world. You will experience all these blessings if you obey the LORD your
God:Your children and your crops will be blessed. The LORD will give you
prosperity in the land he swore to your ancestors to give you, blessing you
with many children, numerous livestock, and abundant crops.
Exodus 23:26 There shall be no
one miscarrying or barren in your land; I will fulfill the number of
your days.
Romans 4:17-18 Abraham's faith
did not weaken, even though he knew that he was too old to be a father at the
age of one hundred and that Sarah, his wife, had never been able to have
children. He staggered not at the promise of God through unbelief; but
was strong in faith, giving glory to God.
Hebrews 11:11 By faith Sarah
herself also received strength to conceive seed, and she bore a child
when she was past the age, because she judged Him faithful who had promised.
Isaiah 66:9 Shall I bring to the birth, and not cause to
bring forth? saith the LORD: shall I cause to bring forth, and shut the womb?
saith thy God.
Galatians 3:29, Galatians 3:9 "Now that
you belong to Christ, you are the true children of Abraham. You are his heirs,
and now all the promises God gave to him belong to you."
Exodus 23:26 and none will
miscarry or be barren in your land. I will give you a full life span.
After
2 years of waiting, our promise from God, Otis Valor arrived on March 24th!
Hallelujah!
